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domesticating feral tomatoes

i don't think i've ever officially *gardened*. i was simply never told that it was a thing i could even ever do. several years ago i lived in an apartment building with a grassy front lawn in montclair, new jersey, and during a visit from my uncle vinny, he said 'what's with the grass, you should pave it.' it's absurd to most, but there was virtually no grass within sight from our bay ridge apartment when i lived with him as a baby. what i'm getting at is, basically, a balcony counts as 'nature' to me.

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reverend jenn

'getting married' is not something i want to do ever, but that's not to say i am against marriage. all the weddings *i've* been to were fun as hell! also, i became a reverend a couple of years ago so i could officiate the unions of my besties, phil and celeste.

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bug vs. shark

last night i sent a newsletter after about 5 months of elecronic mail silence, hehehe whoops. a couple of folks wrote back asking for me to send pumagreg updates...

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hello, august 〰️ ➰ ➿

it's a new month. it will be a true blessing if it's even only 99% as aggravating as july was for me. for a better chance of that, i went into it with a fresh haircut and looking like a living, breathing doodle.

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my truth

in which i reflect on one of the most epic and kept-behind-closed-doors cake failures ever in my mid-thirties.

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my candles needed thicker wicks

remember in may when i made candles and they burned a tunnel instead of all the way through? my hypothesis was that i needed thicker wicks. before i get into that adventure, i first want to tell you *a tale of the ultimate betrayal of friendship*...

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lemon cake, hold the shingles!

when i was little, my best friend got something called 'chicken pox' and i was extremely jealous of the days off school, attention, and lemon cupcakes he got. the cupcakes, probably from a box mix, were baked for him by my dad and were the most delicious baked good i had ever had.

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