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fmk: butterfly clips, thyroid disease, seventh grade?

i've been using the butterfly clips i bought last week to pull back my bangs when i work out. it works so much better than a headband, which often creased and ruined my wavy fringe.

photo of my head from up above showing for butterfly clips holding my bangs back. i’m in a gym locker room.

what you can't see in that photo is the fresh quarter-sized bald spot smack in the middle-back of my head. i've documented a bit of my alopecia journey on here before, and i thought i finally stopped the losing-hair part, but...lol, i fuckin thought huh!

i stopped crying about my hair loss back in august when i stopped going to the dermatologist for steroid shots. my friend died and i was grieving and i was just tired of all the fucking pain and grief that i couldn't even take personally because how do you get revenge for something that was no ones fault but, like, nature? [editor's note: i tried but could not bring myself to make a joke here about how i'm going to start littering as revenge.]

i decided to go back to the basics last week and try to get my hashimoto's disease into remission ahead of my next round of tests in a few months. i am going to the gym, doing the strength training program i did over 2 years ago, going on more walks, and trying to go to bed earlier. with these adjustments and more, i am pretty optimistic - i guess!

anyway, the butterfly clips are real cute, surprisingly practical, highly recommended, etc.

4 other things i remember from 7th grade besides butterfly clips

  1. in french class i coughed and my friend, who was going through one of those "i want to be an emt when i grow up" phases, said "i know your lungs aren't filled with water because if they were you'd be dead" and i thought it was so fucking funny and out of nowhere that i couldn't stop coughing and the teacher made me take it out to [intentionally offensive franglish] la nurse's offeese
  2. i had a crush on my homeroom teacher's wife who i never met and literally knew nothing about except for the fact that she looked like mariah carey in the photo of her he kept on his desk - at least i thought she did, who really knows!
  3. a science teacher put his hand on my desk and told the class that if he stood there for some unrealistic number of years, the atoms of his hands and the desk would merge together and i was too shy then to say "i think you'd die and decompose actually" and i carry that regret to this day. you can blame my shyness back then on trauma, though, so i really need to give myself some grace there!
  4. the girl who had a locker next to mine had a small handbag made out of a coconut and i thought it was the most creative, clever thing in the world.

xoxo jenn

this was published January 10, 2023 under living health hair hormones fitness lifting alopecia thyroid hypothyroidism hashimotos