🗣 live laugh yawn, coming back soon! about

live laugh blog

there exist more palatable fusions of “italian for kids” and baked goods than just that spaghettio pie

you may have recently seen a video of a woman making a "spaghettio pie". i won't try it, i honestly don't think it will work. i also, not to get too high off of my own supply, own an actual rolling pin.

woman pressing bread with her forearms

i do get what she's trying to do; she wants to take a food her kids love (spaghettio's) and make it a bit more grown up yet still fun in order to refine her kids' palates and/or create instagram-viral mommy lifestyle content. who among us is not? but i think she's going about it all wrong, and not just where where she added milk to make it "juicy".

woman pouring milk inot a pie filled with spaghetti-o

see, there's no way you can just put spaghetti-o's in a crust with cheese and skim milk and expect it to come out with the textural fortitude of hearty pie! so, for hoobastank2 this week, i proposed some more sound and reasonable ideas for kids-italian/baked-good fusion cuisine.

pain au marinara

a pain au chocolat but the chocolate is red

instead of rolling your pain au chocolat with a chocolate bar, roll in a a frozen stick of marinara sauce - preferably of the chef boyardee kind.

lasagna toaster tart

a lasagna noodle with a poptart icing photoshopped on top of it

instead of icing a toaster pastry, ice a damp cooked lasagna noodle

thumbprint cookies

photo of thumbprint cookies with pizza rolls photoshopped in place of the pizza rolls

it's just a classic thumbprint cookie but with a totino’s pizza roll instead of a hershey’s kiss.


there's a lot to be said about the pressure put on moms to keep meals exciting and simple and quick, so i absolutely don't blame spaghettio pie mom for trying. these are just some additional recipes that she can (and you can, but definitely i shan't) try that may turn out a little less...juicy.

if you like or dislike these ideas, make sure you join us wednesday nights at 8pm est on twitch for hoobastank2. and as julia child, twice, said: bone apple teeth!

xoxo jenn

this was published January 27, 2021 under laughing food hoobastank2 cursed-kitchen